To read Finny’s diary in full pick up a copy of the latest AOC but for now, here’s a few choice extracts from his first offering.

Finny on… wedding season

“My roomate and good friend Tim Murtagh got married today. Obviously the day would not have been complete without a bit of Murtagh nudity (him, not his missus), so we used the photo booth at the wedding venue to express ourselves in the only way we knew how. I was only assisting a very drunk man take his clothes in there, may I add, and not once did anything of mine see the lens. Check the wedding album if you don’t believe me!”

Finny on… Call of Duty

“Our evening’s entertainment in the UAE has predominantly been Call of Duty. Broady is the biggest gaming geek I’ve ever come across. He will have a good career after cricket attending Xbox conventions. But the most fascinating gamer is Trotty. Just like his batting, he will get in a focused state and try and stay there, no matter how much the lads try and put him off. But be careful not to thrash him too bad, otherwise he will switch the console off and order you out of his room.”

Finny on… credit card roulette

“Tonight 14 of us went to The Ivy restaurant in Dubai and decided to play credit card roulette. There were plenty of sighs as people’s cards were picked out and eliminated from paying by the waitress. A big ‘boo’ rang out when Trotty’s card was picked out (I don’t know why). And then we were down to our final two – Graham Gooch and Kevin Pietersen. As the last card was taken away , it was as if a crowd of whooping football hooligans had invaded the restaurant, as it was revealed that KP was picking up the tab for the boys. Thanks Kev, it was a top meal.”

Finny on… Speedos

“Realised how many grown men are wearing Speedos by the pool. Slightly disturbed to see one bloke tucking them in to his bum cheeks to get an all over tan. Went to my room feeling decidedly queasy.”

Finny on… flatulence

“We had a practise session today, which was a really good workout. The intensity of the session may have given us jelly legs, but it shouldn’t have made our bowel movements looser. It was like playing Dutch ovens without the covers on the journey home. Graeme Swann is by far the most shameless – a diet of spaghetti bolognese and painkillers have turned his guts to a dreadful state. But the person I was least expecting to emit such smells was newly-wed Alastair Cook. His wry smile just as I got my first whiff was not that of a former choirboy. I wonder if his better half knows what she’s let herself in for!

Click here to save yourself a walk each month and subscribe to All Out Cricket magazine

Having lost two Test matches in the last two years, England have now lost three in less than three weeks and the blame will quite rightly be placed squarely on their batsmen. In a series in which the batters were expected to fill their boots it’s been the bowlers who have excelled, only to be let down time and again by a batting unit devoid of confidence and unable to counter Pakistan’s spinners.

It’s been a tour England will want to forget, but given their schedule over the next 12 months – which includes a tour of Sri Lanka in March and a visit to India next winter – there are lessons that must be learnt from this whitewash, and quickly.

Tellingly England’s batsmen failed to score a century in the series and the middle-order of Kevin Pietersen, Ian Bell and Eoin Morgan registered just 200 runs between them at a paltry average of 11.11. The dismissals of all three on day four in Dubai were symptomatic of their travails.

Pietersen once again failed to bring his bat down straight against the spinner and had his timbers rattled, while Bell got locked into the defensive mode that we’ve seen throughout the series and when a long hop came along only succeeded in agonisingly looping a dolly to cover point. Morgan, meanwhile, continued to struggle in striking a balance between attack and defence.

Pietersen and Bell have plenty of credit in the bank after starring against Australia and India and England’s management are too canny to hit the panic button and make sweeping changes, but Morgan now finds himself under serious pressure. His knock of 31 included some fine shots – a flick of the wrists to send a straight six back over the head of Saeed Ajmal providing a reminder of just what a fine strokemaker he is – but it was never an innings that suggested any longevity.

The calculated, controlled aggression that makes Morgan such a fine one-day player is absent when he’s in the whites and his attacking strokes appear to be born out of panic rather than judicious shot selection. His dismissal in England’s second innings rather summed things up. Having carved Umar Gul over point for four, Morgan showed further attacking intent by giving Gul the charge in his next over. The wily seamer saw him coming and dropped it short; Morgan tried to adjust accordingly but feathered an edge through to the keeper.

It was a cunning piece of bowling from Gul and England’s batsmen have played worse shots in the series – plenty worse, in fact – but Morgan’s negotiation of the delivery revealed a muddled, cluttered mind. On the surface he might appear as calm as ever, but Morgan’s ice-cool temperament appears to have deserted him. It might be the last shot he plays in Test cricket for a while.

The upcoming ODI series will no doubt come as a relief to the Dubliner and stacks of limited-overs runs could yet seem him retain his Test place in Sri Lanka, but with a batting average now the wrong side of 30 after 16 five-day outings, England’s selectors may be forced to act.

Click here to read the Wisden Almanack report of Pakistan’s famous win over England at Lord’s in 1992

I had the pleasure of speaking to Mike Brearley yesterday. He, like the rest of us, has been engrossed by events in the UAE but was struggling to get his head around England’s travails against spin, and in particular those of Kevin Pietersen. “He seems to get mesmerised and often misses straight balls,” said the former England captain. “He looks for spin that might not be there and he makes a palaver of it, instead of just playing the ball – which he is so capable of doing.”

For a while, at least, it looked as though Pietersen was beginning to break free of that hypnosis and find an answer to his spin demons. His footwork showed greater intent; coming down the track to Saeed Ajmal and driving firmly to mid on before swatting his next delivery through the covers for two. Two trademark Pietersen boundaries followed in the next over from Umar Gul to take him to 25 off 26 deliveries. He was beginning to motor and there was a hint of swagger returning.

Of course, the true test was yet to come in the form of left-arm spin. Misbah-ul-Haq wasted little time in bringing Abdur Rehman into the attack, but again the signs were positive as Pietersen played authoritatively in defence – getting a good stride in and, by and large, playing with a straight bat.

He continued to play with purpose in Rehman’s second over, skipping down the track to sprint a quick single before slog sweeping the left-arm twirler for four to move on to 30 and bring up a 50 partnership with Andrew Strauss.  Was the spell beginning to break?

Unfortunately for England, the answer was no. Four overs later Rehman – England’s tormentor in the second innings at Abu Dhabi – conjured another wicket as Pietersen’s woes against southpaw spinners continued. Caught on the crease, he was rapped on the pads and Simon Taufel raised the finger. Pietersen can count himself unlucky after the subsequent review showed the ball was flicking 2.2mm of the leg stump but the angle of his bat – pointing towards mid on at the point of impact – once again demonstrated how susceptible he is against the spinners.

With Pietersen’s departure, so went England’s intent. Four overs came and went without the tourists adding to their total before the ever-vociferous Adnan Akmal fortuitously stumped Ian Bell, who had crawled his way to five off 28 balls. Eoin Morgan and Matt Prior soon followed – Morgan to the 35th lbw of the series (a new record for a three-Test series) – as England’s middle-order succumbed to spin once again.

In a low-scoring match England needed a batsman to take the game by the scruff of the neck and establish a first innings lead. For an hour, it looked as though Pietersen could be just that man. Instead England must look to their captain, who remains unbeaten on 41, and the lower-order to add vitals runs on day two and give their hugely impressive bowling attack a lead worthy of the name.

Click here to read how David Green would counter Pakistan’s spinners

Tomorrow sees England take on Pakistan in the third of a trio of desert Tests that have been anything but sweet for the Three Lions. In fact, two abject defeats have left a rather unsavoury taste in the mouth for the Andys, Flower and Strauss, and once again called into question the team’s collective approach to slow bowling.

It is clear that if England are to compete in Dubai – where they failed to make 200 in either innings last month – they must make some changes. Less so in personnel, although it is possible that Ravi Bopara will be given another chance at Test level at the expense of Eoin Morgan, than in the methods for negotiating the combined threat of Mohammad Hafeez, Abdur Rehman and the irrepressible Saeed Ajmal, who last week became the fastest Pakistani to reach 100 Test wickets.

Perhaps ‘negotiating’ is the wrong word. England’s passive approach in the second innings at Abu Dhabi (chillingly reminiscent of that terrible day in Adelaide four years ago) was rightly pinpointed as the key reason for the dramatic collapse that sealed the series, and it has become patently clear that attack will be the best form of defence for a top six that has had little success attempting to play from the crease.

Ideally we would see the likes of Andrew Strauss, Ian Bell and Kevin Pietersen (best not tinker with the quirky Cook and Trott, eh?) use their feet considerably more than we have seen in the first two Tests, although this may be deemed a risky tactic against the likes of Ajmal and Rehman, who use flight sparingly to say the least. However, there is no reason why England’s batsmen (particular the four lefties in the top seven) can’t sweep more against Rehman, who has fewer tricks up his sleeve than Ajmal.

More generally, getting on the front foot (rather than playing from the crease) will massively decrease the chances of another slew of lbws, and – hopefully – negate whatever spin Pakistan’s bowlers are able to extract. Most of all, however, I’d like to see more of England’s batsmen take the aerial route. Perhaps a fun thing to say in a Test match preview, but we’re yet to see how Pakistan’s bowlers react to the sort of pressure that only big-hitting and fast scoring creates.

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However England perform with the bat (and here’s hoping things can’t get any worse) they will still have their work cut out to force the win that would add respectability to the final analysis of a sobering series. Not least because it looks like Pakistan will add extra batting strength to their XI. The second seamer hasn’t really been used in either game, with Junaid Khan a virtual spectator at Abu Dhabi, so, being ahead in the series, they might well see fit to bolster their batting. If they opt for this approach, Umar Akmal could come in – and he could be the perfect addition, as he will give Pakistan some extra attacking flare of their own.

England’s bowlers have been good so far (that hasn’t been the problem) but their task would grow harder if faced with a longer batting line-up. Whatever way you look at it, England are up against it to prevent a first series whitewash in four years.

That said, current match odds on Betfair suggest there is very little between the teams, seemingly based as much on England’s long-term as short-term form. With this in mind there may be value in laying the draw at 3.65. These days, few Tests end in a stalemate and in this series both sides have been susceptible to collapses.

For all the latest odds check out www.betfair.com

The Stone Roses have done it. So have the Inspiral Carpets. And now the Happy Mondays have put aside their musical differences, Zimmer frames and freedom passes and announced their reformation along with a clutch of new tour dates and festival appearances.

Critics will doubtless claim these bands have no chance of recapturing their former glory and that reforming is a cynical ploy to rake in some dough – and they’re probably right. But as I peeked out from behind the sofa and watched on in anguish as England turned what should have been a very gettable run-chase into the equivalent of an ascent on Everest without oxygen, Sherpas or a discernible plan, I pondered how reformation, renewal and even resurrection would look if applied to the current England batting unit.

Even Andy Flower confessed that England’s batsmen look all at sea against quality spin in Asia, and the stats support him. In matches against India, Sri Lanka and Pakistan in Asia, Kevin Pietersen averages just 29.54 from 13 Tests, Ian Bell 31.60 from the same number of games and Andrew Strauss 35.35 from nine Tests – with only Alastair Cook (40.64 from nine Tests) of the current top six having a creditable average. Jonathan Trott and Eoin Morgan are experiencing their first taste of Test cricket in Asia on this tour – it’s not been a pleasant one.

For Morgan it has proved particularly painful, with Geoff Boycott commenting that, “when he comes in, I daren’t go for a pee because I know I’ll miss him”.  England’s limited-overs supremo might suffer the axe after his struggles but his replacement Ravi Bopara faced a nightmare of his own against Sri Lanka’s spinners in 2007, leaving England with a headache ahead of two Asian tours before the turn of the year with no aspirin in sight.

So, back to our theme of reformation, renewal and resurrection. Given the chance, which former England batsmen would we restore to their prime to take the place of England’s top six for the third Test in Dubai and the rest of their Asian adventures in 2012? Having waved the magic wand, I’ve come up with the following:

1) Marcus Trescothick
Test record in Asia against India, Sri Lanka and Pakistan: 15 Tests, 1,100 runs @ 37.93
Other England openers have better records in Asia, but the Somerset skipper’s ability to attack the spinners proved a boon on England’s last triumphant tours of Asia to Pakistan and Sri Lanka in 2000/01 and would surely counter the inertia witnessed in the second innings in Abu Dhabi.

2) Geoff Boycott
8 Tests, 706 runs @ 58.83
Picking Boycs would not only get him out of the commentary box, but his dour accumulation and the fact he is a right-hander would be the perfect complement to Trescothick’s aggression. In any case, he’s told TMS listeners he could take runs off Saeed Ajmal and co with a stick of rhubarb; imagine what he could do with a bat!

3) David Gower
16 Tests, 1,138 runs @ 56.90
Starred against Pakistan’s legspin maestro Abdul Qadir in the 80s and another former great who could teach the current crop a thing or two about batting positively against high-class spin with a top-drawer sweep shot and the ability to play the ball as late as possible.

4) Ken Barrington
8 Tests, 903 runs @ 90.30
No England batsman in history can match his average or tally of four hundreds in Asia and, like Misbah-ul-Haq, Barrington understood that if you are going to block, you need to do so with purpose so as not to relinquish the initiative to the bowler.

5) Graham Thorpe
10 Tests, 821 runs @ 48.29
The Surrey left-hander mastered Muralitharan in his own backyard and almost single-handedly led England to a famous series win in 2001. When boundaries were scarce, Thorpe understood the importance of maneuvering singles to keep the scoreboard ticking over.

6) Ian Botham
9 Tests, 599 runs @ 49.91, 35 wickets @ 26.31
Not only would his bowling ensure England could always play two spinners in Asia, but he’d also have the opportunity to reprise one of the greatest all-round performances in the history of the game. In the Golden Jubilee Test of 1980 against India, Beefy took 6-58 and 7/48, and smashed 114 for good measure, as England won by an innings.

Whimsy though this is, this top six and the four-man bowling attack that performed so well in Abu Dhabi would finally leave England with a team capable of beating Asia’s big three in their own backyard. In their absence England fans will have to put up with more chastening defeats before the year has run its course unless the current batting unit can find an answer to their spin demons.

David Green is the warped mind behind The Reverse Sweep cricket blog and regards Douglas Jardine as his ultimate cricket hero. You can follow David on Twitter @TheReverseSweep

Click here to read David’s account of Pakistan’s rollercoaster ride

A new year, a fresh start. Nothing but potential ahead. So what resolutions have you made? To be a better person? Get fit? Use more of the herbs, spices and condiments in your kitchen cupboard?

Working on that work life balance has been the focus of sportsmen too. So what did those Cricketing Twits get up to away from the field?

1. Join a gym – but don’t overdo it!

Herschelle Gibbs (hershybru):

Back to Perth now, cortisone injection at 330 and a week off til the next game..wat to do that is the question!! Where’s the party at Thursdays in Perth…

Right injection done and dusted wasn’t too bad..docs orders to put feet up tonight but tomor we can let things down again..aviary look out..

2. Get outdoors more – is camouflage really necessary (see main picture!)?
albie morkel (albiemorkel):

Great weather in Slummies. Day off time for some fishing!

3. Take a break – pace yourself now…
Dwayne Bravo (Newbigdog):

Relaxed @ the beach earlier today then went onto a gr8 win 2nite! Thx 4 all ur support #RedForce

4. Stretch yourself – mush! hike!
Matthew hoggard (Hoggy602):

Anybody got any husky’s to help me pull this?

5. Try approaching things differently – could catch on?
Michael Vaughan (VaughanCricket):

Always great to bump into @Jess_Ennis .. But slightly concerned that she was making sand castles in long jump pit..

6. Learn to cook – didn’t work out so well last time Shane, mind yourself now.
Shane Warne (warne888):

Slipped into my sexy new diesel jeans and having a BBQ with my 3 children and their friends – wind still howling , but sun shining ! X

7. Get a new hobby – Herpetology anyone? (Study of amphibians, thank Google.)
Dale Steyn (DaleSteyn62):

A little visitor just came hopping into the house…

8. Lose some weight – who ate all the pies? Kevin apparently…
StuartBroad8 Stuart Broad

Too many mince pies over Xmas @kevinpp24 ?!

9. Get engaged – sorry Ladies
Jason Krejza (JK404):

Proposed to my girlfriend yesterday. She said yes! Officially off the market

10. Get some sun – but cover it up!
kevinpp24 Kevin Pietersen

Today will be spent on a sun lounger until the sun sets.. But, I just realised reading a book on an iPad in the sun is a no go.. #damn

StuartBroad 8 StuartBroad

England have done, but when will the whole world realise its unacceptable for men to wear speedos round the pool?! #horrendi

You can follow all the cricketing action (and not just the New Year’s resolutions) in real-time on Tweetsport. You might just be surprised what you find.

1. Alastair Cook – England

294 v India at Edgbaston

After racking up 927 runs at 84.27 in the calendar year, England’s prolific opener and Ashes hero was always likely to be there or thereabouts when the AOC readers came to choosing their favourite Test innings of 2011, and so it proved.

Having dispatched India with surprising ease at Lord’s and Trent Bridge to open up a 2-0 lead in the series, England went to Birmingham knowing that victory would complete their ascent to the top of the Test rankings. The bowlers set the ball rolling to dismiss the demoralised tourists for 224 and then Cook went for the jugular, batting for just shy of 13 hours as England mercilessly reached 700 and beyond.

But, inexplicably given the powers of concentration he had shown up to that point, on 294 the Essex left-hander eagerly latched on to a wide half-tracker but only succeeded in slapping it straight to deep point to fall just short of becoming the sixth Englishman to reach triple figures. It was an anti-climatic end to a wonderful innings but nonetheless perfectly summed up Cook’s unquenchable thirst for runs in 2010/11 and the sheer ruthlessness of Andrew Strauss’ side, who went on to complete the victory by an innings and 242 runs.

2. Ian Bell – England

235 v India at The Oval

Only one Englishman scored more Test runs in 2011 than Alastair Cook and that was the elegant Warwickshire right-hander who came of age in stunning fashion to notch up 950 runs at an astonishing average of 118.75.

The best of his five tons last year, as judged by you, wasn’t his maiden Ashes ton at Sydney nor his controversial 159 against India at Trent Bridge, but his chanceless 235 against the same opposition in the fourth Test at The Oval to help England to a historic whitewash. Batting at his preferred position of No.3 in the absence of the injured Jonathan Trott, Bell was at the very peak of his substantial powers and recorded his first double ton in Test cricket, having fallen just one short of the landmark three years previously against South Africa.

He’ll drop back down to No.5 in the upcoming series against Pakistan but Andy Flower will be safe in the knowledge that Bell is now ready and able to slot in at first drop when needed.

3. Kevin Pietersen – England

202* v India at Lord’s

Cook and Bell may have batted England to convincing victories over India but it was the indomitable Kevin Pietersen who set the tone for the series with a belligerent 202 not out in the first Test at Lord’s and he completes an all English top three.

Sensing the importance of the occasion against the world’s top ranked side, Pietersen got his head down and played perhaps his most responsible innings yet for his country, taking 134 balls to reach fifty and bringing up three figures after nearly five hours at the crease.

From there he opened up, smashing Suresh Raina for three boundaries in four balls to bring up his double ton, showing a disregard for the Indian bowling attack that was to become a theme for the series as England posted what proved to be a matchwinning first innings total of 458-8.

4. Michael Clarke – Australia

151 v South Africa at Cape Town

An unbelievable innings in a barely comprehensible Test match and the Australian skipper’s innings of 151 out of a first innings total of 284 just looked better and better as the match wore on and batsman after batsman came and went cheaply.

While South Africa’s pace triumvirate of Dale Steyn, Morne Morkel and the debutant Vernon Philander ran amok on a juicy Newlands track, Clarke didn’t just stand firm, he launched a counter-offensive – bringing up his century off just 108 balls in an innings that harked back to his early days – as his teammates flailed hopelessly at the other end.

His efforts were to ultimately prove fruitless as Australia were skittled for 47 in the second dig to leave Graeme Smith and Hashim Amla to knock off the runs but, nonetheless, this was an innings of such character and flair that it could well prove to be the defining knock in Clarke’s tenure as skipper.

5. Rahul Dravid – India

146* at The Oval

Test cricket’s leading runscorer in 2011 completes the list and it’s hard to argue the Indian veteran doesn’t deserve it given the stoic defence of his wicket throughout a series against England that saw the rest of his teammates wave the white flag and fall limply time and again.

Dravid was the only Indian to reach three figures in the series and he did it on three occasions, the most admirable of which was a backs to the wall unbeaten 146 as he carried his bat in the fourth Test at The Oval.

Promoted to open the batting because Gautam Gambhir was suffering from concussion, Dravid was defiance personified as he blocked, nudged, nurdled and took blow after blow to the body – all the while remaining unbeaten. His efforts were all in vain as India collapsed to another innings defeat but Dravid could return home from surely his last tour of England with his head held high.

Now that all that Halloween and fireworks nonsense is behind us let’s focus on cricket Christmas! Are you struggling to know what to get your loved one this year? Well struggle no more – here is our ‘Top 10 Christmas Gift Ideas’ inspired by those Twittering cricketing types.

1 Boys love toys – get your gift ideas in early

Darren Gough spoke for the big kid in all of us this week when he went retro for his gift choice. Not too subtle there Dazza, socks it is.

Off to have a peek at nintendo 3d Mario kart racing launch! At haymarket ! Could be fun with all the strikers there today ,lots of trouble @DGoughie

2 High tech – make sure you read the instructions

Graeme Swann let technology beat him. Try turning it on and off again…

I’ve just downloaded the newest iPhone Software and now feel like a monkey staring at a space shuttle control desk@Swannyg66 

3 Something sporty perhaps?

Kevin Pietersen would be happy with tennis shoes, although would probably swap them for a Chelsea win right now.

Wish I’d worn shoes to play tennis today.. #blistersforstupidity @kevinpp24 

4 Self help books – get the person in your life something they really need

After @johnnyyates pointed out Tino Best’s shortcomings with sledging perhaps some comebacks might be appropriate. Anything ‘ot pot related should work.

Best cricket sledging ever, how did it feel @tinobest ?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fl1rHQj7P5c&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Or perhaps a joke book?

Joke Of The Year Coach Dex just said “This Guy Can’t bat Better Than A Ninja Turtle”hahahhahahaha oh shittttt it was the funniest thing ever @tinobest

5 Get your mates something they want

Graeme Swann has a few ideas what to get Cook and Bresnan. My money is on the DVD.

That’s a busy day of media done promoting ‘the greatest DVD of our time’, now off to Lord’s to play tour guide …and on your left you will see where Alastair cook hides his saxophone, on your right where Tim bresnan keeps his colouring book” etc @Swannyg66

6 Unexpected guests – have a little something for everyone

Yorkshire Cricket reached out to old friends… in an attempt to get some new ones.

Would love to be the first county club to get to 9,000 twitter followers – can we get there before Christmas? #yccc @Yorkshire_ccc 

7 Novelty socks – the default gift for a bloke of any age

If they are for a good cause all the better.

#4hsocks @HeroesRugby game Dec3 my weight is behind @HelpforHeroes http://www.heroesrugby.org.uk for tickets @BumbleCricket

David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd  is sorted for socks and he also heard from one of his heroes.

Reckon I’ve had a tweet from the great Courtney Walsh. Absolute gent Am made up !

8 Spend some time with someone special

Well Michael, this is awkward. Yes Michael it is. Do you come here often?

Lord’s really is a diverse place in the winter, tonight there is going to be a speed dating event!@HomeOfCricket

9 Public spectacles – do something for the community

When not taking his kit off for a good cause, Andrew Gale can also be found bringing Christmas to Batley. He’ll catch his death poor love.

Fitness test this morning before I go switch the Xmas lights on for batley tonight. Anyone going?? @GaleyLad

10 Festive fayre – a bit of cheese is right good

Shane Warne likes a bit of Goughie’s Yorkshire cheese.

@DGoughie hey buddy thankyou for the beautiful cheese !!!! Very very nice – more please !!!!! @warne888

But struggled for inspriation when it came to his other half and so turned to the Twitterverse. Not cool Shane, not cool at all.

Still waiting for some good Xmas present ideas for@ElizabethHurley - had a few good suggestions – thankyou…

If you think cricket’s for life and not just for Christmas, follow it in real-time on Tweetsport. You might be surprised what you find…

This week on Twitter, KP has been looking at his options and decided it’s time for a change.

I’ve become a fashion designer; all for a good cause. Take a look at @BBCCiN’s Style Challenge here http://yhoo.it/vB25NZ on@YahooOmgUK #CiN

Tomorrow the shirt & tie go global. I’ll tweet a link to online sales this eve or tomorrow.. BTW: there are no sizes big enough for #7chins! [KP's pet name for @piersmorgan]
@kevinpp24

Although looking pretty stylish at the launch, we have to say we’re not entirely convinced by this combo, Kev.

This should be compulsory attire for SSN wonder surf report. Men & Women. #boardies&singlets

Pietersen’s career change may have been in aid of a good cause but he was less charitable with former cricketers who had chosen to pick up the mike.

Hate having to watch SA v AUS test match muted.. Cork in studio-MUTE!! Wessels commentating-MUTE!! Both as bad as Nick Knight.. #clowns
@kevinpp24

***

I wonder what he would say about Rod Marsh and Andy Bichel to become cricket selectors. @CricketAus

While Andy Bichel said he was: “Looking forward to making a contribution to the game I love… over the last little period we’ve been on the right pathway”, Rod Marsh said he was: “Excited to be back working for Cricket Australia…the most rewarding time I ever had was working with CA at the Academy in Adel”

***

While Graeme Swann (@swannyg66) enjoys being on tour (book promotion tour that is), Aakash Chopra previews his book “Out of the Blue”.

Here’s the cover. What do you reckon?
@cricketaakash

***

First Schumacher, then Thorpe and now another sporting legend is making a comeback. Hoping to have more success than the others is Shane Warne who appears to have got his cricketing mojo (and waistline) back since dating Miss Hurley and the cricketing public of Melbourne look set to reap the benefits of his passion for the game. At first he teased us…

For the record-Im Seriously contemplating & considering coming out of retirement for the 20/20 big bash competition in Aust over dec / jan !

Before confirming what we’d all dreamed about but never dared to believe.

Who’s going to come and support the Melbourne stars at the mighty MCG ? I hope to meet all of you there – adults and kids !!!!

Also a big thankyou to all of you who have supported me & I hope your excited as me to see me back playing at the MCG !
@warne888

It’s hardly a full-time permanent role but it’s great that another generation will get to see the spinner, albeit a much slimmer version than before!

Warnie confirmed for all 7 games, our website has all the details #wehavewarnie
@StarsBBL

Welcome back the king and looking forward to Hayden v Warne game on 20th @ gabba , people lock that date in! Go the heat !!!!
@darren_lehmann

Welcome back Big Man!

Follow all the cricketing action (not just KP’s fashion tips) in real-time on Tweetsport. You might be surprised what you find…

Ricky Ponting

Test record against Steyn: 115 runs from 146 balls, 1 dismissal, average 115.00
South Africa’s first opponents are Australia and Steyn will be looking to set the record straight against Ponting on home soil. The former Aussie skipper has not been afraid to attack Steyn in the past and until the second innings of their most recent meeting he had never been dismissed by him in Tests.

Mahela Jayawardene

Test record against Steyn: 75 runs from 108 balls, 1 dismissal, average 75.00
The only time Steyn has faced Sri Lanka in Tests was back in 2006 and Jayawardene made tons in both matches, including an imperious 374 in Colombo. On that occasion Steyn tasted a series defeat for one of only three times in his career and he will have the elegant strokemaker looming large in his crosshairs come December.

Ross Taylor

Test record against Steyn: 0 runs from 1 ball, 0 dismissals
Steyn will be licking his lips when South Africa head to New Zealand in March, having taken 20 wickets at 9.20 the last time the two sides met. Taylor managed just 44 runs in four innings in 2007 and only faced a single Steyn delivery but he is a far superior batsman four years on and Steyn will be eyeing him up as the prize scalp in a potentially fragile Black Caps batting line-up.

Alastair Cook

Test record against Steyn: 89 runs from 222 balls, 0 dismissals
Finally, the Proteas arrive in England next summer in a potential showdown for the number one spot. With Morne Morkel having given Andrew Strauss the run around in previous encounters, Steyn will have his sights firmly fixed on the England skipper’s opening partner in a tussle that could prove key to the outcome of the series.

Kevin Pietersen

Test record against Steyn: 81 runs from 93 balls, 3 dismissals, average 27.00
Once Cook has been shot down, Steyn will renew rivalries with the leopard that changed his spots. He has had mixed fortunes in the past against his former compatriot, snaring him on three occasions but taking some tap in the process, and this contest is likely to be pivotal in the battle for world supremacy.

In this video interview, England’s batting maestro reveals how he rediscovered his love for the game after reinventing himself as a person and a cricketer on his return to South Africa last year and insists he has put the captaincy debacle well and truly behind him.

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This century’s most beguiling and charismatic cricketer is on the verge of greatness, halfway towards the 10,000 Test runs that will secure his legend. So why does he always feel he has a point to prove?

Kevin Pietersen shuffles in to a box in the Lord’s Media Centre dressed in a white adidas jumper and dark blue jeans. The hair’s humbly cropped these days, mere specks of grey appearing at the sides, those famous hairdos of legend now distant memories. He shakes AOC’s hand, flashes that Jack Nicholson grin, and asks how the magazine is doing. Hard rain crashes against the window. His gaze drifts out towards the drenched outfield, to the scene of old triumphs.

It was on this ground four years ago that Pietersen made his Test debut. 17 wickets fell on that first day of Ashes 2005, although Pietersen’s wasn’t one of them. Striding forward out of his crease, playing with hard hands and great conviction, he survived the onslaught from Glenn McGrath as his new teammates flailed. The following morning he hit McGrath into the Lord’s pavilion. No one had seen McGrath treated like that before. It just wasn’t the done thing.

Two months later, and this wasn’t the done thing either, Pietersen hit seven sixes at The Oval to secure the Ashes for his team and their mesmerised public. In the maelstrom that followed, Pietersen could generally be located with his arms around Andrew Flintoff, in the gossip pages of The Sun, or announcing to anyone who would listen – and that meant all of us – exactly how it felt to realise one’s dream. The natural bombast and, drunk on success, unapologetic hollering established a new superstar in England’s sporting firmament. And something else was established. This one wasn’t like the others.

So four tumultuous years down the line, is Pietersen still living that dream, or has he woken up? “[I’m living it] one hundred per cent,” he says without hesitation. And then: “There’s not a lot that could take me away from my love of cricket, or my love of playing for England.”

But although ‘not a lot’ is not much, it’s still more than nothing. Six months ago Pietersen resigned the England captaincy just five months into the job after an unseemly public row with his employers regarding Peter Moores’ credentials as England coach. Pietersen was said to be “hurt and disappointed” by the outcome. The turmoil must have contributed to an interview given during last spring’s tour of West Indies, when he confessed to a Daily Mail journalist that he was desperate to return home. In the stands English supporters, fed that line, were up in arms. In the press, opinions ranged wildly. Some felt Pietersen should have kept his mouth shut and shown more flexibility with his personal working relations; others thought he’d been unfairly hung out to dry for telling his version of the truth. One thing was generally agreed on: Pietersen was not cut out for politics.

On the captaincy issue Pietersen won’t play a shot. Still burning with a sense of injustice? Angry still? He’s not saying. And why should he? “It was five months ago. It’s gone. Done. Done.” Pietersen feels that he has been stung by the media before, so the old easy way with a quote has given way to a more guarded, less demonstrative media personality. Shame. English cricket’s eras live on through their characters, and more than any other player from today’s cash-rich six-hitting experiment, it is Pietersen who best embodies what the modern game looks like. If he is more wary than before, it means that Pietersen – an independent spirit – has had to forsake some of the unchecked flair for speaking his mind which makes him so interesting, and which infuses this batsman (if, indeed, batting is an extension of one’s personality) with a singular brilliance.

He shrugs. This is where we are now. “Some days you say things which on a good day you might not have said, [but] on a bad day you tend to say them. Like everyone does. But I’ve got to live with that fact and realise that what I say also makes headlines, which I’ve realised in the last couple of months again. I have to keep telling myself because I think I’m just a cricketer playing cricket, living an amazing, enjoyable life playing for England. Sometimes I have to think, ‘Watch what you do’, or ‘Watch what you say’. Which is hard and I don’t like that.”

He’s so imposing on the pitch, but today the baggy sweater and soft Zen-like utterances has the effect of cutting him down to a more manageable size. This is the new Pietersen interview technique, but it’s not the tone we’ve come to expect from the modern era’s most bombastic cricketer. He is quick to bring the conversation back to his quiet lifestyle, and to the small clique of select family and friends that he can trust. “I try not to give away too much to others,” he explains.

Does he even recognise the KP of media legend? “It’s a tricky one. Because people who know me know exactly what I’m like. And it’s quite difficult, because you look at the stuff that’s written or the stuff that’s said, and people who don’t know me come to their own conclusions. But at the end of the day, people write what they want to write; what really matters to me is what my wife and my close friends and family think. In answer to the question: I don’t think I’m that person.”

I wonder to myself if the upheaval from the captaincy – and the general whirlwind that seems to blow around him whenever he lets his guard drop – has left Pietersen more confused and insecure than he could have ever imagined. “Believe me,” he says, “I am a very warm-hearted, kind, polite person who does what he does to the best of his ability.”

Pietersen is the best English batsman many of us have ever seen. Extreme hand-eye talent, guts, grit, and supreme belief in his method, combined with a fierce work ethic, all melds together to produce a cricketer destined to be one of the true greats. A famous tinkerer with technique – when AOC spoke to him last summer he was obsessing over his hands getting outside his eyeline – he is working on something specific at the moment, but won’t divulge trade secrets. The eternal puzzle of batsmanship intrigues him.

When pressed on the question of his greatness, he pats it back down the pitch, leaving us to speculate. But if there is a fear from an infatuated public that Pietersen – an early IPL advocate and recent $1.5m acquisition for Bangalore Royal Challengers – could retire prematurely from international competition to become a freelance cricketer, he throws his hands at the wide one and connects sweetly: “I’m not 23 anymore, I’m 29 and probably got five, maybe six years left playing for England. I’ve got goals in Test match cricket. I want to try to score 10,000 Test-match runs. I’m playing in a happy dressing room, a winning dressing room, playing with a winning combination.

“I’m 5,400 runs away from 10,000 runs so unless I score that in the next year or two… It’s a long way away. It’s a long-term goal that I’ve set myself. I’d like to achieve it but if it doesn’t happen then I will never ever wake up at the end of my career and think ‘What if’, or ‘Why didn’t I do this’. I would have done everything that I wanted to do and lived my dream.”

If Pietersen achieves the 10K mark it will make him the most prolific batsman England has ever produced. To get there he will have to trust himself and take a thousand risks to claim his reward. But as we have all seen, taking risks is not something Pietersen has ever struggled with. Last season he attracted criticism for losing his wicket on 94 against South Africa, trying to clear the man at deep mid-on posted specifically for the big shot. As ever with Pietersen, opinions were split. He was either a foolhardy sucker or an audacious thrillseeker with an average of 50 who entertains like no other. Pietersen finds the criticism tiresome.

“I’m a calculated risk taker,” he says. “I’m a positive player who has to take criticism. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t – that’s life. “ So it’s a case of take it or leave it – that’s the way you play?  “Yes. That’s the way I play. I know there is a lot of criticism that comes with that but there’s a lot of good stuff that goes with that as well. I wouldn’t get to 94 or 97 blocking it. You’ve got to try to score runs.”

He cites an example: “The other day [against West Indies at Riverside] I got out on 49. I had an offside field, I could have easily just knocked it there for one. But the team decision after lunch was to get on with it. When I saw the ball in my area I wasn’t worried about how many runs I had. I could have been selfish and gone ‘bang’ for one run and ‘oh yes there’s another 50’. I decided my headset after lunch was to be positive and to be super aggressive to get us to a total so we could bowl West Indies out twice. So I saw a ball, tried to hit it, got out – tough luck. I was trying to do it for the team and that’s the way it is.”

But is it also the case that Pietersen has a tendency to get bored in a way that perhaps a more mechanical batsman wouldn’t? He’s bristling again: “Double hundreds are hard to get you know. I’m flattered when people say ‘you should have more double hundreds’ because it’s a really nice thing for people to say, it’s a great compliment, but they’re hard to get. There’s no way somebody can turn up and just change a hundred into a two-hundred. It’s not that easy. When people say I should have done – how many double hundreds have they scored? Crikey, it’s not easy to do. It really isn’t easy to do.”

This summer it’s the Ashes. You may have noticed. Pietersen is locked in. Already people are stopping him in the street: “Everybody you talk to – they don’t care what happened against the West Indies, they don’t really care what we do at the Twenty20 World Cup. All they’re worried about is Australia.”

And if it’s not folks on the street, it’s cabbies chewing his ear off. “They love it,” he says, the naturalised Londoner coming out. “It’s great getting into a London cab. Their cockney accents, you’ve got to punch details in as you go along.” So is this your city now? “I said to my wife last night ‘Jeez, I love this city’. We went into town yesterday to meet my brother and best mate for dinner. I just sat down at the restaurant and said ‘Jeez, I love this place’. It’s a great city and we’re very lucky and fortunate enough to live here.”

With the buzz around the grounds reaching fever pitch, who’s going to do the business on the turf itself? Pietersen’s answer is immediate and emphatic. He’s thought long and hard about this; he sounds like a captain. “Anderson, Broad, Matt Prior and Ravi Bopara.”

Of Bopara, Pietersen has always been a fan. During this year’s IPL Pietersen nominated him as a superstar in the making. What is it about his game that impresses him? “His positiveness, no fear of failure, the way he is, the questions he asks, he’s keen to learn, he loves his cricket and he’s got this never-say-die attitude.”

So you see a bit of yourself in him, then… “To be honest with you,” he continues, reluctant to go there but unable to resist, “I’m not blowing my own trumpet by any stretch of the imagination… but I see a very positive way about Ravi. It’s very pleasing to know that you’ve got a guy in the dressing room, or guys coming into the dressing room who are so positive, not scared of things and not worried about failure.” Pietersen will be the key man, of course. The kingpin. He has made 16 Test centuries from 52 matches at 50.49. He has unleashed a fusillade on Australia’s finest before, so they know what’s coming.

Finally, I ask him for his standout innings from the past 12 months. Cricketers usually enjoy answering this one. “If I can say three, I’d say the one against South Africa here – my first Test innings against South Africa at Lord’s. The 150 here was hugely satisfying. The Test hundred I scored the day I got the captaincy [100 at The Oval also against South Africa]. I really enjoyed that because people thought the captaincy may have a negative effect on my batting. Then the 97 I scored in Jamaica after everything that happened in January [with the captaincy resignation]. I was bitterly disappointed not to get to three-figures but to get the runs that I actually got there was so, so satisfying.”

I offer what I think sounds like praise, acknowledging that these were runs made under real pressure – tough runs in tough circumstances – and all achieved when Pietersen felt he had a point to prove. I mean it as a compliment – this being the true test of a player’s worth – but instead he takes it as further evidence that his essential decency and commitment to the cause is being brought into question.

“I find that strange,” he says. “I don’t really understand it, because there are not too many other cricketers who always have points to prove. I realise that I’m South African playing for England and all the connotations that go with it, but I find it so difficult that I’ve always got to prove things to people. That’s one of the hardest things that I face in my career. Three times in the last 12 months it’s happened.” He shrugs again.

Our time is up. Back comes the Nicholson grin, and the handshake. Again he wishes AOC well, and then he is off to prove another point to another journalist. For the first time, it occurs to me that Kevin Pietersen may be tiring of having to talk about himself, which is unfortunate for the rest of us, because we’re as fascinated as ever.

Maybe he doesn’t realise how fond we are of him and what he’s done for cricket in this country. Maybe he’s just forgotten – maybe 2005 was just too magical to be held up as a true reflection of where he was in the world, and what we thought when we saw him standing there. English cricket is eternally thankful that this remarkable man interloped from Natal to Nottingham a decade ago, to follow that dream to make him complete. What Kevin Pietersen needs is a summer of peaceful runmaking, leading England to Ashes victory. And he could do with a standing ovation or two from a public that, although fickle (this is sport after all), still holds him in the highest regard. And then, after returning that urn to its rightful place, preferably at The Oval on the last day, he can go out somewhere nice and quiet for a meal with the missus.

When Andrew Strauss and Alastair Cook found themselves padded up and walking out to face India’s opening bowlers soon after tea on the first day of the third Test at Edgbaston, they should not have been too surprised. In the past decade very few sides have enjoyed batting first there – indeed, most sides have failed to even last a full day.

This was the case last summer when Pakistan, having won the toss and chosen to bat, contrived to be all out for just 72. England reached 42-0 by tea, and were already 40 runs ahead at stumps.

It was a similar, if less dramatic, story in the 2009 Ashes. A rain-affected first day meant just 30 overs of play were possible but the next morning Australia were skittled; eight down by lunch and all out soon after, with just 70 overs in the innings. Again, not a full day’s play. Rain meant England were unable to capitalise on their 100-run first innings lead against Australia but if the rain stays away, Edgbaston tends to produce a result. In the last 20 Tests the only four draws were all heavily affected by the weather.

The Edgbaston Test against South Africa in 2008 saw England – at that point under Michael Vaughan’s captaincy – win the toss and bat first. A duck from the skipper and single-figure scores for Kevin Pietersen and Paul Collingwood meant that England fans were watching the South African opening batsmen before play finished for the day, and the Proteas went on to complete a convincing five-wicket win.

And the trend stretches back further. In 2006 Sri Lanka won the toss and, after choosing to bat, their 10th wicket fell on the final ball before tea on day one. England reached stumps trailing by just three runs and went on to claim a six-wicket victory. Even in the famous 2005 Ashes victory, all 10 England wickets fell before stumps on the first day.

In fact, we have to go back to 2004 to find the last time a side managed to bat out a full day in the first innings at Edgbaston – and that was against a toothless West Indian attack.

Strangely, despite this recent history, captains have almost always chosen to bat for the last decade at Edgbaston. Before Strauss put India in, only the Australians in 2001 and 2005 had opted to take to the field having won the toss – and on both occasions came away with all 10 English wickets before the day was out.

All in all, it’s been a good toss to lose in recent years at Edgbaston but on the evidence so far Strauss made the correct call in backing his bowlers. At the toss MS Dhoni conceded that he too would have opted to field and, after witnessing his side slump to 224 all out, he would have seen very little to change his original view.

1. Discovering Tresco

A beefy left-hander made 167 for Somerset against Glamorgan in 1999 during Fletcher’s tenure as coach of the Welsh county and left an impression. A year later, having taken charge of England, Fletcher took a punt on the same batsman despite his modest county record and called him up for the NatWest Series against Zimbabwe and West Indies. Marcus Trescothick promptly smashed 79 on debut and Test selection followed. The rest, as they say, is history. Arguably Fletcher’s greatest find.

2. Winning In The Windies

Steve ‘Grievous Bodily’ Harmison went some way towards compensating for England’s woes against Marshall, Holding, Garner, et al by inspiring the tourists to their first series win in the Caribbean for 36 years in 2003/04 with 23 wickets at 14. The victory helped galvanise a talented crop of young players under Michael Vaughan’s captaincy and Fletcher’s astute leadership.

3. South Africa Put To The Sword

England earned a draw in the fifth Test at Centurion to claim a first series win in South Africa for 40 years in 2004/05 after Andrew Strauss batted them to victory at Port Elizabeth and Matthew Hoggard inspired a smash-and-grab at The Wanderers. The victory left Fletcher’s charges full of confidence and bigger and better was to follow that summer.

4. The Punt On Pietersen

The young, brash South African wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea when he first arrived on the scene but quickly achieved hero status with an incredible entrance to international cricket – scoring three centuries against his native country in the 2005 ODI series. Fletcher subsequently gave him his Test debut in the hottest of sporting cauldrons that summer and KP repaid his faith by helping England to Ashes glory.

5. The Pinnacle

The Greatest Test Series Ever. Everyone knows the story, the drama, the protagonists as England reclaimed the Ashes after 18 years of hurt. To win against a star-studded Australian side, touted as arguably the best to have ever played the game, was unquestionably the zenith of Fletcher’s tenure.

Click here to read Ed Kemp’s analysis of the ‘Fletcher Factor’ in this summer’s Test series between England and India.

After a rocky couple of years, Kevin Pietersen’s extraordinary career is about to enter its defining phase. Can he play the role of senior batsman and claw his way up towards that 10,000 Test run mark? And, after six years of toil, sweat and scrutiny, how much does he want to?

AOC: Okay, last time we spoke it was at Lord’s just before the Ashes ’09, and you said 10,000 Test runs was well in your sights. Do you still see that as a plausible target?

KP: Yeah, well, I don’t know how many I’ve got. How many have I got now?

AOC: A few hits short of 6,000…

KP: Well, I want to play until I’m at least 35. If I keep myself fit and keep myself in good nick that gives me another five years, which hopefully should get me close.

AOC: You’ve clearly evolved as a player in the time that you’ve been in our sights. How do you think you’ve changed as a player?

KP: I’ve had to become a lot more responsible. You go through stages of seniority in a team. You come in and you’re young, then you go through a middle period where you’re up and out and you’re doing things, and then you come to a senior period when you’re one of the senior players and you’re supposed to be looking after the England team, and then you become captain and then you go back into the ranks. It’s been an incredible journey.

AOC: When you first emerged you were almost uniquely free and liberated as a player – in England we weren’t used to players like you. But with that extra responsibility you’ve had to become a more conventional player; do you miss those early days?

KP: Of course I do, I was scoring more heavily than I have been in the last 12 months! No, I mean I love the responsibility. I love the fact that I’ve got to be a little bit more responsible in the things that I do, and I know that my wicket is quite a pricey wicket for the opposition so it adds that extra bit of challenge to my game, which is great.

AOC: There have been certain occasions over the last couple of years, say the Edgbaston game against South Africa in 2008 when you cruised to 90-odd and then hit the man at long on, and you get beaten up in the press. Does that send you potty or do you just ignore it? Do you appreciate that you have an average of 50, and that often it works, and sometimes it doesn’t?

KP: It used to annoy me yeah. I used to get all huffy and puffy and puff my chest out and say: ‘What the hell? Why are they saying this?’ But you know, I don’t care now; I’ve got absolutely no interest in what’s written.

AOC: Do you feel you’ve got nothing to prove?

KP: Absolutely nothing. I think I’ve played enough to not have anything to explain to anybody. Seventy Test matches [actually 71 before this summer], however many T20s, I’ve been fortunate enough to win three Ashes medals and a [Twenty20] World Cup medal, there’s not a lot more I can achieve. Just personal runs and playing for longer.

AOC: So what drives you then?

KP: Well, I’m very fortunate to be playing in a wonderful era, one where we are winning these Ashes series and where we won a world trophy last year, and I want to continue winning these things. It’s such a good team at the moment and such a young team that I do believe strongly that we can win world tournaments, and that’s what I’m playing for now.

AOC: Is that Adelaide knock up there with your most satisfying innings, because of what had gone before?

KP: It was, and because of the enormity of the challenge as well, and the enormity of the series, and the position in the game. It was right up there.

AOC: Watching it, it looked slightly different to your other landmark innings; there was a sobriety to it that might not have been present in other innings. In a way it was less exciting for it, but it was more impressive because it seemed to suggest a more mature approach.

KP: I know what you mean, but I still scored 227 off 290 [actually 308, but we’ll forgive him that] balls.

AOC: True, but in the old days it would have been even quicker, and there wasn’t much in the air from what I recall.

KP: Well, I got served up a lot of good stuff in that innings and was very lucky to put it away. It was a time when I just enjoyed doing what I was doing, and like I said, I was in a really good place. I’m in a really good place at the moment.

AOC: Do you see yourself over the next 10 or 15 Test matches consciously playing within yourself like that?

KP: I’m just going to play like I feel. I’m a feel player.

AOC: Okay, so you mentioned Adelaide; which other innings, in 20 years time, are you going to tell your boy about?

KP: Well probably the hundred against South Africa at The Oval [in 2008], first day as captain. That was a nice one. And 2005 at The Oval, that Ashes hundred.

AOC: Your life changed overnight, right?

KP: Yeah, to a degree. It sort of shifted things. I don’t know. I’ve been fortunate enough to score some nice ones on occasions. There are quite a few that I particularly enjoyed.

KP was launching the new ODI England Kit, supplied by England kit sponsor adidas, at the JJB Sports Store in Enfield. Purchase your ODI shirt in-store at any JJB or online at www.jjbsports.com